i have no clue...

the list of things that could fall under my title for today's post is totally endless.  i have never been more clueless about anything in my entire life than i am right now about this pregnancy of mine.  even when i attempted to do the law school thing and thought about wearing fabulous pink power suits and fighting for the underdog like Elle Woods, i STILL never felt as directionless as i do right now.  (wow..."directionless" must be an actual word because when i typed it, spell check didn't even highlight it)


for the past 121 hours, i have had so many random things happen and have convinced myself many different scenerios were right around the corner. my brain has taken me down many roads leading to the land of "what if".


i've convinced myself that the twins will be out within hours.  i have convinced myself that i have anemia. i have convinced myself that i have broken my own water without my knowing because i've gone to the bathroom so much.  i have convinced myself that i have drank too much water out of my attempts to keep contractions at bay that i have almost drank myself to death (my headstone would read R.I.P Mommy Parsley "the aquafina was just too much for her pregnant, soul").  i told you...my crazy brain combined with my growing twin pregnancy hormones have put me into a scary place.  just shave my head and call me britney spears!


we are 34 weeks and 4 days today.  i always said that if i ever hit 34-weeks, i would never ask for anything again.  that is like tiger woods saying he'll never touch another lady-friend again now that he's "healed".  each time i've hit a pregnancy milestone, it's almost an addictive feeling i get to "want more" time.  i guess i'll never really get enough time with them in my belly.  maybe i should just accept that.


regardless of my craziness.  regardless of how exhausted i might be by getting about 3-4 hours of sleep total. i......don't.......care.  each day these babies grow is much more important than their mommy's stamina at this point.  i'll take the heat...just let them keep cooking in my little kitchen.

33 weeks preggo (what do you think...does wearing black make me look skinny?)